Tag: jessalyn gilsig

RECAP: Glee, The Rocky Horror Glee Show

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And an ab-ulous night it was.

I have three confessions to make: One, I have no idea what the Rocky Horror Show is about. Two, I never liked/watched Full House, I had no idea who “Uncle Jesse” was. Three, I loved the Rocky Horror Glee Show…and I don’t know why. Before the RHPS fanatics come at me with pitchforks and torches, let me reiterate: I don’t know what the RHPS is supposed to look or sound like. I only have vague memories of my hometown theatre putting on the production, but this was circa 2001.

Was the plot advanced in any way? No. Character development? Nah. Did the episode really serve a purpose? Not really. Bottom line: I was entertained and it had the right amount of snark. Feel free to disagree, I am full of unpopular opinions.

Overlooking John Stamos’ horrible lip-syncing, “What Happened to Saturday Night?” was pretty damn near perfect. I have to disagree with the vast majority of the reviewers on iTunes, I personally liked his “John Travolta-esque voice.” Oh and Will, please stop moping. Your pity party ended last year.

I know that the fact that a girl was going to be playing Frank-n-furter was one of the main gripes RHPS fans had a problem with. I thought Mercedes sounded fine in the song. Obviously she’s going to sound different than Tim Curry so there’s really no sense in comparing the two. Also, there’s no use in blaming the writers/producers for this, John Stamos was originally supposed to play Frank and the network shot him down. Got a problem? Drop FOX a line. Do you really think that Ryan Murphy would have planned all along for a female Frank?

I think my favorite song had to be “Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch-a Touch Me.” Jayma Mays sounded like a chipmunk that inhaled helium, but it strangely worked. Watching the scene was uncomfortable at times; Will was obviously about to spontaneously combust at any moment. I also thought the “Time Warp” was very good. Cory Monteith has his moments when he actually sounds like he can sing and this was one of those times. I YouTubed the movie scene and I personally prefer Dianna Agron’s version to the scratchy throat-sing/talk of the movie Magenta. But I’m also a fan of Dianna’s so I might be a little biased.

It was also nice to see the guys having body image problems for once and not the girls. Best line of the night:

Sam: Stop knocking yourself out, just be you and the sexy will flow through.

Finn: Yeah you’re right, I don’t need to hide behind my muscles like you do.

Sam: Awesome, I think. Are you insulting me? Where are you going?

Finn: To show everyone how hot and sexy I am.

I think we all knew that Cory doesn’t have the best bod out of all the Glee guys. Don’t believe me? Get out your season one dvds and watch closely during “My Life Would Suck Without You.” Well, the camera does add ten pounds right? Anywho, it looks like he did tone up for this episode. I guess he can stop showering with a shirt on now.

So happy to see the return of Sue’s Corner. This needs to become a weekly thing again. Puck, oh where art thou? Glad to see you’ll be returning to McKinley in two weeks. I can deal with a return of the Mohawk, but the gages have got to go. And I fully expect you to get in a fight with Sam over Quinn. Don’t let me down. All in all, I enjoyed the RHPS tribute, even if it was an extremely watered-down version of the original.

I am going to leave you with the rest of the great quotes in the episode and there were many. Nice work, writers.

Santana: Earlier today Artie asked  if he could make a gigantic omelet when I’m done with the giant ostrich eggs I’m smuggling in my bra.

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Sam: There ain’t no carpool lane to sexy.

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Sam: (about his Rocky costume) Is there a way I could wear some gold board shorts or something? These are really short I’m afraid I’m going to show off some nuttage.

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Sue: Take your sick, perverted sex games out of this school.

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Sam: I got asked to be “June” in the “Men of McKinley High” calendar.

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Becky: Get me some chocolate, or I will cut you.

RECAP: Glee, Grilled Cheesus

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Who knew that Brittany would ever be the voice of wisdom?

I’m going to keep this short and sweet so I don’t end up just bashing Glee for 800 words. Last night’s episode “Grilled Cheesus” was just not my cup of tea. None of the six songs featured made it to my iPod, there was only one quote that made it to my quote book, one of my favorite songs was butchered and the religious overlying theme was a tad overpowering for my taste. I don’t understand how people were crying and claiming this was the best episode of Glee yet.  I didn’t cry. I hardly paid attention…although that may have been partly to the two lovebirds making small talk a few feet away from me. I am of the opinion that Glee needs to stick with the happy-go-lucky. They just do it so much better.

I’ll leave you with a few of my main [unpopular] thoughts:

  1. Am I the only one at all disturbed that Finn ate what had to be an at least three days old cold grilled cheese?
  2. Music overall grade? D. “One of Us” by Joan Osborne is one of my most favorite songs ever. Okay, maybe saying it was “butchered” is a bit of an overstatement, but it was nowhere near as great as the original. “Bridge Over Troubled Water” is also a favorite of mine…not anymore. The autotune on “Losing My Religion” and “Only the Good Die Young” was out of control. This is why critics and viewers alike claim that the cast can’t actually sing.
  3. Religion is not particularly a touchy subject for me, but it is definitely not on the top of my list of subjects I like to talk about. Just don’t bash my beliefs and I won’t bash yours. Kurt can’t have been the only person in that glee club who doesn’t believe in God. To that end, so what if he doesn’t believe in God? I found it really surprising how personal everyone took it. The only character so far who has been portrayed as being exceptionally religious is Quinn and she had what…two lines? I felt like the whole notion of God was being forced down my throat the whole episode. Not appreciated.
  4. Has anyone noticed how no one on television seems to have two parents anymore? Rachel is the only character so far who has two parents. Finn’s dad died. Kurt’s mom died. Puck has a deadbeat dad. Quinn’s dad left her mom. And we haven’t even met most of the glee kids’ families yet. The go-to device for emotional television seems to be sending a parent to the hospital. We all know that Burt is going to be okay, he’s a regular now. The producers wouldn’t promote him to regular status for the one episode he dies in. If the only reason for Burt’s heart attack was to get Chris Colfer crying in an episode, it wasn’t worth it.

So this ended up being roughly 500 words. My bad. I have been so disappointed with Glee this season. But I can’t seem to stop watching.

SUE QUOTE OF THE NIGHT: [to Will] “If your kids want to praise Jesus in class I suggest they enroll at Sweet Holy Mother of God Academy on I Love Jesus Street.”

RECAP: Glee, Britney / Brittany

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It’s Britney, bitch.

It’s no secret that I heart Britney. Going to her concert last year was a pre-teen fantasy come true and I didn’t even get a Britney Circus whip. When Glee paid tribute to Madonna last year, it didn’t even phase me. The only Madonna song I was aware of was her duet with Britney on “Me Against the Music” and I only knew of “Like a Virgin” through Moulin Rouge. It didn’t really matter to me if they did her justice or crapped on her career.

When it was confirmed they were doing an all Britney (plus one random Paramore song) episode, it made me nervous. They’re walking a thin line here, it better be great. Britney cannot be imitated. The covers needed to be something new and completely different.

The first time I listened to the Glee covers of the songs in this episode, I was seriously underwhelmed. I’m sorry Lea Michele, but you have an amazing voice but you cannot pull off Britney. I was decently impressed but Heather’s voice, but it was nothing special. She has no real power when she sings. Stick to dancing, girl is fierce. At first I hated “Toxic,” and I mean HATED it…I’ve grown to somewhat like it. Okay, it’s constantly on repeat. “Stronger” is probably my next favorite after “Toxic” but the rest…I really could do without.

Can I pose the obvious question of why Dianna wasn’t given a solo for this episode? She doesn’t have the strongest voice of the Glee-bunch, but she would have been the closest match to Britney. How sweet would it have been for Quinn to sing “Sometimes” to Puck?

The whole hallucinatory Britney-effect was hard to believe and yes, I know this is tv land. It seemed like an excuse to get John Stamos onscreen. He is an interim character, he is the Mike Chang of his love triangle.  I’m sorry, but it’s time for the “Asian fusion” to end. I am so happy that Artie is actually fighting for her. We all know that Will/Emma and Artie/Tina are endgame.

Can Finn and Rachel break up NOW, please? I cannot stand her character. She’s needy, incredibly insecure when it comes to Finn and is willing to change who she is for him and uses Quinn, my favorite female character, as a pawn in her quest for Finn’s affection. Quinn looked genuinely depressed during “My Only Exception.” Finn or Puck, I don’t care which, just give the girl some love.

There is one last subject of discussion: Jacob. Ben. Israel. The kid is comic relief, but tonight was complete overkill. I don’t want to know about his naked butt sweat stains. I don’t want to see him jizz in his pants. There was no need for “The Britney Sex Riot.”

Overall, the episode was not Glee’s best but it matches the caliber of “Audition” and last season’s back nine. I don’t know what to think of the promo for next week’s religion themed episode, but if they butcher Joan Osborne’s “One of Us,” shit is going to hit the fan.

SUE QUOTE OF THE NIGHT: [to Will] “I’m going to take your house, your car, your extensive collection of vests. I mean seriously, you wear more vests than the cast of ‘Blossom’.

RECAP: Glee, Auditions

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I can’t say that Glee’s season premiere floored me. Sure it had its highlights: Newly reinstated Head-Bitch-In-Charge Quinn taking down Santana in the hallway, Asian camp (nuff said) and the whole “Glee’s Big Gay Summer” recap. So much win. On the downside, there were no Sue Sylvester one-liners I found overwhelmingly funny, Coach Beiste is an eye sore and the Finchel PDA has got to go.

I’m also not loving this Sam Evans character yet. Okay, I admit “Billionaire” has pretty much been on repeat since I got the web rip last Thursday, kid’s got a nice voice. But his taking Finn’s quarterback position and being a possible love interest for both Quinn and Kurt makes me doubt I will like his character. Quinn needs to be single or at least until Finn comes to his senses and dumps the annoying bitch. And I agree that Chord Everstreet’s unnaturally large mouth and J. Bieb’s haircut is distracting. By the way, what kind of a name is “Chord Everstreet”? Aren’t there laws against child abuse?

The music, however, was pretty great. I’ve already sung the praises of “Billionare” and the other four songs were just as quality.  The cast managed to make “Empire State of Mind” bearable for me, I’m no Alicia Keys fan. Minus some highly obvious autotune, Lea Michele and Charice did a good job with “Telephone”. Their respective solos “Listen” and “What I Did For Love” were also very well done.

Glee has proven in episodes such as “Throwdown”, “Wheels” and “Journey” that it can master comedy, drama and musical numbers in perfect harmony. Ever since the series went big, things haven’t been the same. It is clear that there is now a bigger budget and they are trying too hard to please the fans. Some of the magic was recaptured in last season’s finale and I was hoping that it would carry over to this season. Unfortunately this did not happen.

I know there are many who enjoyed the premiere and I don’t want to rain on your parade, but you have to admit, Glee just isn’t the same as it used to be. I am however optimistic that things will improve over the course of this season. They are already taking steps in the right direction and the Britney episode looks “outrageous”.

As always, fellow gleeks, don’t stop believing.

FALL TV WISHLIST: Glee

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The fall television premieres are drawing closer and this television fanatic cannot wait. Every year I like to make a wish-list of certain things I would like to see happen on a particular show. My record is fairly sucky, I tend to root for couples that don’t stand a chance or the death of a character that is vital to the series (*cough* Peyton *cough*). I have made wish-lists for the shows that I plan to watch this coming fall. There are a lot of shows, so don’t judge.

Glee –-> Season 2, September 21 @ 7- FOX

Glee‘s mix reviewed first season ended on a high note. However I have high expectations for the hit show’s sophomore season. Not least of which is the Britney Spears tribute episode, which better be freaking epic. From interviews I’ve seen, Ryan Murphy & Co. are making some good changes (fewer songs and more dialogue, more Mike Chang, Brittany and Santana) and some I find questionable (Finn/Rachel together the entire season and Tina falling out of love with Artie). If it’s not too much, creative team, I have a few requests:

  1. More Quinn: Quinn has become my favorite character on the show and I can’t wait or her to be the HBIC of McKinley High again. Quinn’s screen time slowly dwindled last season, which needs to change and give the girl some solos! Dianna Agron admittedly has one of the weakest voices in the cast, but I personally loved “Papa Don’t Preach.” I like Quinn with both Finn and Puck, so I don’t necessarily care where they take that storyline. Since it seems like they are choosing to go the Puck route, I will at least need some interaction between Finn and Quinn, they got royally screwed over in the back nine.
  2. Improve consistency: The back nine of season one had little to no consistency with the first half. One minute Finn is admitting he’s not over Quinn, the next he is professing his love for Rachel.
  3. Minimal Finn/Rachel overall: I have no positive feelings for this “power couple” at all. I think they’re my new Lucas and Peyton. I feel like I should them because it’s inevitable that they’re going to end up together, but somehow I cannot stand them together. I have already braced myself for a season chock full of puke-worthy Finchel moments, but if all possible – keep them to a minimum, that’d be lovely.

Here ends my Glee season two wish-list. I’m expecting my hopes for the season will end in devastation but it’s nice to dream.

RECAP: Glee, Journey

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Okay. Let’s face it: the first 13 episodes and the back 9 episodes of Glee are practically two different television programs. Ever since Glee‘s spring debut, I have become less and less enthused to tune in on Tuesday nights. The back 9 did have its highlights, Lea once again rocked every song thrown at her, the cover of “Total Eclipse of the Heart” had me in Glee-induced tears for the first time, and I loved seeing the continuance of Artie and Tina’s relationship. But the complete lack of closure with the Finn-Quinn-Puck storyline, Santana getting more songs than Tina/Quinn, and the whole rushed “I’m your mother” storyline with Shelby had me wondering if the creative team was smoking something or just didn’t care about continuity at all.

But this episode “Journey”, the first season finale, was something different. It was a constant reminder of the brilliance that the pilot brought. It brought the comedy, the drama, and the sickly-sweet moments together in an absolutely perfect combination. It felt like a personal shout out to all the disgruntled gleeks who lost faith in the geniusness of Glee. It was as though Ryan Murphy was proclaiming to the world: Don’t stop believing.

I had two predictions going into tonight’s episode: Nude Erections…pardon me, New Directions was going to lose and Shelby was going to adopt Beth Drizzle Jackie Daniels Fabray-Puckerman. 2 for 2. I rock.

Considering the fact that before the back 9 I hadn’t cried during Glee, it was even more impressive that I started squirting salt water from my eyes within five minutes of the episode starting (Damn you Tina Cohen-Chang, Asian love). On a scale of 1-5 tissue boxes, “Journey” gets three. For the record, 5 tissue boxes= the LOST finale and I don’t think another television show will be able to top that one.

The whole Journey mash-up was easily New Direction’s best performance to date, HOLY KEY CHANGE EPICNESS. Cory Monteith’s vocals have improved so much since the pilot. Remember his horrendous take on John Travolta? Shiver. I was so distracted by the epicness of the Journey medley that I completely overlooked the girls’ ad campaign for Bump-Its, the tinfoil dresses, and Artie’s overly greased hair-do. Hell, I even forgot about the Finn to Rachel “I love you”…bitter. As much as I love ND, Vocal Adrenaline without a doubt knocked them out of the park. Jonathan Groff MUST make a return in season two. I would gladly marry his voice. I thought the “Bohemian Rhapsody”/birth scene was awkwardly clever. I really don’t think many mothers-to-be shout out “LET ME GO!” during the birthing process, but oh well, this is Glee-verse. Oh and by some miracle, Quinn gave birth to a two-month-old baby! No wonder it hurt so bad…

This might be the first Glee episode ever where I loved every single song featured. This is saying something since I truly despise Queen and Journey. Yes, I am aware that I have horrible taste in music. The highlight for me had to be “To Sir With Love.” Everyone on this show is such a pretty crier, I look like Sandra Oh. And it ain’t pretty.

The ever so eloquently-spoken Mr. Schuester speaks these words in the beginning of the episode, “Life only really has one beginning and one end and the rest is just a whole lot of middle. And I love you guys too much to not let you make the most of it. Now, I was going to quit once, but you guys brought me back with ‘Don’t Stop Believing‘…” Congratulations, Glee, you’ve officially brought me back. See you in the fall.